Starting again

I have never been able to keep up with this whole blogging thing. For that matter I’ve never been able to keep up with most anything. I tend to make these great big plans and life keeps slapping me down. I get frustrated and discouraged and step away. Then I have to start all over from scratch.

I’m sitting at home, at my shaky desk in Florida at the moment… I should be sitting on my father’s front porch, watching my son run around and play in the little dusting of snow on the ground at his house in Tennessee. We were on our way up there when life jumped out again and said – yeah no, not right now. What would have been a relatively inexpensive escape from the constant stress I’ve been under… turned into a complete nightmare that has us completely buried and even more stressed out.

I’m realizing that there is no way for me to plan for the ideal – because there never will be an ideal. I’m always going to have to work around the craziness and hope for the best. So here it goes.

I am an aspiring author. Of course I’ve labeled myself that since I was 13 years old. 17 years later and I still don’t have a book published. Yet one other thing I need to work on setting aside the perfect opportunity and work on regardless. That’s where blogging comes in. They say that blogging helps keep the creative juices flowing… and boy do I need it. Because when I’m bogged down by stress, the last thing in the world I can do is focus on writing.

These books… were always meant to be my livelihood. If I put half as much devotion and effort into them as I do my ACTUAL livelihood – I’d probably have a dozen of them finished and published. At the same time though… Had I pushed them out with the ideas I had… I don’t think they would be nearly as good as the ideas I now have in my head. So as much as I hate to admit it… things really do happen for a reason.

So the title of this blog? Obviously has nothing to do with writing… No – it has to do with moving. Moving to Black Mountain, North Carolina to be exact.

bmtn

Right now I’m in Florida… Ugly, dry, oppressive, hot Florida. I was ready and wanting to escape five years ago, and then went on a date. I’ve been with that man ever since… and unfortunately he’s a fan of Florida. It’s taken this long to convince him to consider moving. But I’m beyond ready – desperate even. I can’t take it anymore. Except I’m flat broke. I’m actually beyond flat broke…

The idea… was to get a book published and use that money to make it up North… Great in theory, but stress has prevented me from writing. So back to the drawing board. I guess that makes this the drawing board… maybe that’s what I should put as a tag line. 🙂 So let’s pick up the pieces and try again. Every cent I can spare will go toward my moving account. Every word I get written can be kept track of and posted. Any words of encouragement, pictures of home, stories of crazy mountain adventures would help me greatly. I wouldn’t turn down any monetary donations either, with the promise of a place to crash after I get up there.

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2 thoughts on “Starting again

  1. This is from the month of December, four years back and I wish I had read this earlier! A sudden sense of trying to be of comfort through my words gripped me as I finished reading but I knew I’m four years and a month late. But had I read this on the 24th of December, 2012, this is what I’d say: “Firstly, Merry Christmas in advance! And secondly, dreams don’t turn to dust! Maybe it’s not in the how many books published, or how much time it takes, but in the self absorbing happiness in being able to create, in hoping to reach your goals, in working to fulfill your dreams. It’s not where we go, but the going itself that really matters.
    Love and power to you,
    From the other side of the world!”

  2. Thank you for your kind words. And yes it’s true. The most joy comes in the discovery of writing. The journey that brings you to your destination. And finding the strength to never lose hope, no matter how desperate the situation may get.

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