Don’t TOUCH it!

No one was expecting the scream that split the air that night. We reacted immediately, everyone abandoning their stacks of migrating product. We all arrived at some point of the aisle around the same time.

Pam was frozen with a horrified expression still gripping her features as she pointed. Frank and I exchanged glances and I stepped forward to move the yellow packaged box that still rested on the shelf. And burst into pearls of laughter.

Sitting on the shelf, burried beneath Little Tykes lawn mowers…. was a used condom. Just chillin’. Waiting to be found by our unsuspecting Pam.

“Are you FREAKING kidding ME?!” she cried.

“Clean it up Jen,” Frank told me with a shit eating grin.

“Oh no. You be the manager Frankie boy… that falls on you to clean up the filth in your store.” I retorted.

“Used? How? When? Who?” someone else commented.

“Yep, that’s most of the interogation words. Some questions are better off unanswered though.”

Needless to say, with a very, very thick stack of paper towels and a plastic bag, we cleaned up the mess. We granted Pam her request to move aisles, and were able to carry on with our night.

Ah… remodling days at the Bradenton Toys R Us… way to keep it classy B-town.

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