One would think that as your responsibilities fall in number, that you have more time for things. Perhaps a normal person would. The universe only knows I’m anything but normal. My son has left for the summer. I know – most parents would be doing the happy dance to be rid of their kids for two months. ALL THE FREE TIME!
He left on Saturday… and I’m already going stir crazy. It’s not that I’m a helicopter mom. No, I enjoy that he’s a strong, independent kid that enjoys time with other family. I’m proud that he’s not a “mama’s boy” and needs me at every turn. I’m pleased to imagine that he’s going to turn out alright because he’s adaptable.
No… it’s just because I love my kid. He’s great company. He’s smart, funny, sarcastic and easy going. It’s more that I don’t know what to do with myself when he’s not around. And then it kind of hit me tonight. He’s already ten. He’s already independent. In another few years he’s going to be looking at his future – as he well should be. I guess I need to start considering mine.
I’m not about to hang up my life and brush things off as a job well done… but where do I go next? If the summers make me this insane… what will I do to handle whatever comes next?
The answer of course is right in front of me. It has been for years. I need to learn how to focus. How to sit down and write, even if I’m not feeling up to it. How to remain productive, even when I just want to melt into the bed.
As it always happens… I’ll be taking my annual hiatus from blogging. Only this time I’m telling someone about it. I actually have a pretty busy summer set out ahead of me. We’re moving, putting some projects in motion at the family house, I have quite a few crafts that I want to complete, GISHWHES is coming up and I need to fit in some writing.
I miss summer vacation. I miss being able to fill my whole day with the things I WANT to do, instead of what I NEED to do. Hopefully one day soon those two things will finally be the same. Take care my wordpress friends. With luck and some cooperation with the universe, I should have quite a few fun things to blog about come the fall.